Two Crows Watch from the Gallows Tree (part 8)

"I bet you did."
"Perhaps swordsmanship was the wrong choice for you," Gaius ventured wryly. "Horsemanship seems to be your area of expertise."

Ky looked at him with a sheepish smile. “I mean… yeah, that’s fair. I’m actually good with horses.” Gods, she was so cocky. She flushed and quickly backtracked. “Better. Not good. Just better… than swords… a little.” She cleared her throat, flushing a bit. “I… enjoy them.”

"You may be able to split your time, if you care to," he suggested more seriously. "You've got quite a bit of time to kill."

“Oh, uh, I mean…” Ky nodded. “Yeah, that might be nice.”

Maybe. Or it’d land her with twice the stress of trying to navigate terrifying instructors. It’d be one thing for him to turn her loose with a horse. It’d be an entirely different thing for her to have to have a trainer.

He dipped his head. "Give it some thought. It's up to you, in the end."

“Thank you.” She dipped her head as well. “I appreciate the off—“

“Ky said Mr. Tomhas had to give her a horse or she wouldn’t be adopteded!” Tasia piped up.

“That is not what happened!” Ky was horrified by that allegation and her tone was much sharper than she meant for it to be.

Tasia teared up instantly.

“Sorry!” Ky said, feeling like the biggest jerk on the planet. Great going. Making a literal child sob. “Sorry! That’s not what I— I’m sorry. I…” She teared up too, and furiously scrubbed them away before they could properly fall. This sort of humiliation was just the formula to make Kyber break. Libel. “I didn’t do that. I’d never do that. I-I don’t even want one, I just asked to train, I— I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”

Tasia gaped, shocked at what she’d done.

"It was a misunderstanding, I'm sure," Sera assured them both. "Right, Tasia?"
Sara half-rose out of her seat, but Gaius reached across to her. She'd only embarrass Ky further right now. No sense in harming the girl's self esteem like that.

“Mama!” Tasia wailed, scared and confused, alligator tears dripping down her face.

“You hurt Ky’s feelings,” Aashi chided gently, but still wrapped her arm around her daughter’s shoulders to comfort her. She’d ensure Ky got a genuine apology, but not until both of them calmed down.

“I’m sorry,” Ky repeated, losing her battle against her tears.

“You haven’t done anything wrong,” Tadaaki assured her. “Now or then. It’s perfectly reasonable to ask to play with one of Tomhas’s many horses. We all know it wasn’t what motivated you — and he all but begged you to ask for something. You did nothing wrong.”

Ky staggered to her feet, absolutely humiliated, but entirely unable to curb her tears no matter how hard she tried. It was too much. “Can I be…” she gasped, breath jagged. What was the word? “Can I go?”

Gaius found himself intensely uncomfortable with all this crying; he was used to it from small children but not teenagers that he wasn't particularly close to. He gave a tight nod, unsure of whether he should make a feeble attempt at comforting Ky or just let her sort herself out. He figured the latter would be best.

It was all she needed. She pushed away from the table and rushed towards the door with a pace that could only generously be called a walk. Then she broke into a sprint as soon as she hit the hallway.

Tadaaki watched her go and then sighed heavily. There Tasia had gone and undone the entire amount of progress he’d made with Ky yesterday, in a single sentence. He turned a tired gaze on Tasia, and yet couldn’t be properly mad at her, either. She didn’t know what she was doing. It was clueless, not malicious. And under almost any other circumstance, Ky would have been able to graciously handle the faux pas. But not now. And he couldn’t blame her.

He looked back at Gaius and Sara. “…Sorry.”

"We understand," Sara said graciously, glancing at Gaius. "Talk to her," she murmured to him. Gaius frowned. Him? Why? He was the last thing she needed right now. He gave her a questioning look. When she shot him a small frown he sighed quietly and stood, gripping his cane. He limped from the room without a word.

(Ohoho)

Ky realized when she was half-way down the hall that she didn’t know where she was going. She hadn’t found her hiding spot here, yet. She’d sobbed in a stable many times, and yet the very thought of seeing a horse made her tears redouble. She didn’t want a fucking horse. Why had she opened her stupid mouth in the first place? Why had she come to breakfast?

Some good this had done any of them.

She’d come to try to assure them all that she was fine.

And now look at her. Completely destroying breakfast for all of them.

Gods.

She decided her bedroom was the safest bet and headed for the stairs.


Tadaaki nodded, grateful for the understanding. He figured that she did understand, which made him feel a little better. Understood that there was nothing that could be done about the mouth of a four year old. Understood how much Ky was going through. Understood that this breakdown actually had very little to do with horses at all.

Gaius figured she'd be heading for her bedroom, so he started in that direction. He wasn't sure why Sara was sending him after her. Last time they'd tried to have a serious talk he had offended her quite thoroughly, and she had offended him in kind. They clashed easily and he still had no idea how to handle teens. He supposed he could get her to take a walk with him. Getting dressed for the cold would help slow her mind and the fresh air would hopefully clear it...maybe he would try that. That didn't involve much talking, right?

"It's difficult to lose family, even if it's only for a short time," Sera said. "Her emotions are warranted."

Tadaaki nodded in agreement. “I don’t blame her at all… I just wish I could help.”


Ky rushed up the first flight of stairs clumsily, finding it difficult to coordinate both her speed and the stairs through the tear-filled haze. As she neared the top of the second, her toes caught on one of the steps, sending her head-long onto the landing. She frantically tried to stand back up, but her body was rebelling in all ways just then. So the most she could manage was to press herself into the corner, in front of the next flight heading up rather than visible from the flight below, and sobbed. Still, she was desperately trying to get herself under control. What if Sara followed her? Sera? It’d be humiliating for them to watch her act like such an idiotic disaster. She needed to get her act together.

Gaius started up the stairs well behind her. He could hear her sobs echoing down the stairwell--it sounded as if she had stopped. Good; he didn't want to trek all the way up to the fifth floor just to find a closed door that she wouldn't open.