~PrIcElEsSlOvE~

This was sort of the prolog so there should be another part (if i'm not too lazy to keep going) lol. :wink:

Here's an example which might help you: The water was dripping, she didn't even have a chance to turn off the faucet. Saundra May Jones died, right before turning off ...

That was deep and well paced at the same time. Really good.

It is good - but (if u don't mind me saying so) i just felt like came more from a mixture of telivision shows than anything truly origonal. As I ...

Yeah.....i was a little weirded out until i read the part about you writing it when you were ten - perhaps you might think about moving that to the top ...

Sorry to confuse people. I was acctually using past tense to relive the memory of the main character.