zoeybird13024

Since it doesn't make sense to turn into the Grammar Witch--and what's the point, anyway?--all I have to say is... That was really nice! Everything I wanted to say has ...

It was very nice, but you made a mistake that I see a lot--the words don't match the flow. I got lost in the middle thanks to that. It was ...

Yes, I liked the passion, as well. It truly seemed to be written from true emotion. It was phrased a bit oddly, which took away from the flow, so I ...

This had a nice flow--it was excellent. I just have a couple of nitpicks... Don't Repeat Yourself! You use the phrase "red as blood" twice. Try changing it the second ...

I agree--the first and last lines were lovely. I loved the imagery. The middle was a little awkward due to phrasing and such, but that's already been brought up so ...

Yeah, I agree with everyone else--I felt nothing at all when I read this. I saw no pictures--in my opinion, this wasn't even a poem. It was a few lines ...

Very original--I applaud you for that! There were a few mistakes, but they could be fixed with a bit of revision which I advise. Not highly, however--this story was remarkable. ...

You know...while I read that, the only thing that came to my mind was "Twilight". And then, once I read further, it was just like "Marked" and "Chosen". I suggest ...

That was nice! Seeing as I personally hate math myself and all my friends agree that math class is Hell (even though I actually pay attention and the entire class ...

Question--does it have anything to do with what I think it does? Comments--I loved it!!! It had a nice flow to it. And no, I'm not just saying that because ...

I don't know if it's just me because I'm weird or what it was, but I liked the entire thing. It reminded me of how many of my characters are ...

I've been trying to find the beginning of this for the past hour, but I've found only bits and pieces that are NOT the beginning. When I find it, I'll ...

Other than a few things that could be found and changed with a little proof-read, it was perfect. I loved the imagery--I saw pictures instead of seeing word after word. ...

I agree--long paragraphs make everything terribly hard to read and I got lost once or twice. With spacing, that wouldn't have been an issue. It seemed just a tad rushed ...

Ooh, I liked it. Now, I happened upon this chapter and realized, with embarrassment, that this is the third installment. I'll take the time to read the others either tonight ...