writergirl007

Excellent! I can't believe that the girl dies! That's so sad! :cry: But, it was well done. There were two places that I thought you could improve, but I didn't ...

I think this was a great start. Claudette covered mostly everything (punctuation wise). I, however, like -ly words and find them very descriptive. By the way, thanks for your review ...

It's really good! A bit of a twist I see. :wink: Now, you can post the next chapter! I found a few misspellings, but that was all that I saw ...

I like this story. It's really good. I almost cried when I thought Gabrial died. There is a part that is confusing. It is when she sees that he looks ...

Wow. I don't like the cussing. Umm...This was interesting. A little creepy, and way dark. I like more lighted hearted things. And, At 12:00 pm this is not really the ...

I thought it was good. I like how you added the French and definition at the beginning. It really makes the story come alive more. I didn't really see anything ...

Interesting. So the dark wizard died? Natilie is his sister right? Now you can post the 5th chapter! :P I just have one thing that I would like to point ...

If he dies, I will hurt you!!!!!!! :evil: Okay, here are my suggestions: "A pile of ancient wood, the remains of a shack that would have entirely disintegrated long ago ...

You've done it again, Scribe! Always outdoing yourself I see. :wink: This time, I did find a few things that I think could use correction. "Then again, it might very ...

This is good. I like it. I think I see where it is going. I would be willing to help you if you need a partner. You can P.M. me. ...

I like it, but it has no plot. At least not to me. Also, the feelings of the husband seem a little harsh. Maybe a little more saddness. He just ...

It's good. I like how the character is kind of like you (writer). I don't know what I think of the story, but the way you had this laid out, ...

I have to disagree with Twilight. Your writing is just as good as your name Scribe!!!!! I love it. Vivid pictures and wonderful description. I think I spotted a few ...

It's good. Kind of interesting. A little confusing in the middle. When she meats the dog, I do believe. I don't understand how it ties into historical fiction, but I ...

I agree with everyone else. You need more description. I think you use "This is my last drink" far to much. More description less diologe. It establishes a place for ...