wonderland

A speech tag is just saying who is speaking, so, I said, He said, that type of thing.

Just quickly, those crappy lyrics are only there because I wanted to see how the lyrics would fit before I wrote the song, something I can't do until next month.

@Mizzle-My whole length thing..I know. I struggle with making dialogue realistic, so now I tend to just write the speech, then go back and add everything else later. Thanks, guys ...

Again, Locked.

This is done! Yay, I got a 95% on my monologue! So, i don't need more advice, so, *Locked*

THanks guys. I decided not to enter, anyway, so although I love the advice, you critiques aren't needed at the moment. Locking. Thanks though!

This is hard to review, since it doesn't tell me much about your MC or plot, or anything. Basically it's just a paragraph. I'd say to describe more about her ...

Ah, sorry, it's NaNo. I'm not allowed to think too hard, or my brain may explode.

One thing, yeah, I'm a girl. But other then that, awesome.

Main Character

Hey. ” I say as I stash the bag. Where did I say that??

Well, i'll answer all of those questions, in coming chapters. Oh, and her dad will come. Soon.

Thanks for clearing that up, because it was confusing. I automatically thought, that the cup had broken or something, and she was bleeding from that. It's harder writing from where ...

Oh, it's not that I didn't enjoy it, It's just that you could have put in so much more, but, hey, I know that feeling. Feel better.

Yay! Hurrah! I love it so much! (And the fact that I can sing it to the tune rocks my socks! Write On ~WickedWonder