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natalie

  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: life and all its random glory chapt 3 so far!

    I love this! The characters are getting better and better!! I can completely understand Haley's point of view. It sounds like a morning in my house, only without the brother. ...

    Sep 26, 2008
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: A Degraded Angel

    wow, i move the last line! it really rounds up the poem! okay, dont worry, that wasnt the only thing I like about this. I loved the whole idea of ...

    Sep 26, 2008
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Memos of Bleeding Hearts

    Wow! This is a really strange way of setting out a story but I really enjoyed reading it. I think that, if you wanted to, you could easily extend this ...

    Sep 23, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: You

    I thought this poem was amazing! It held so much feeling and passion. Like the first comment, I love the last two lines. They really rounded it up and held ...

    Sep 23, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: I never told you I loved you

    wow! This poem has a really dramatic and well written voice about it. In general, I'm going to agree with the other comments. I agree that the ending seemed a ...

    Sep 23, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: War (Ask Me No Questions)

    I really enjoyed this poem, it held a great amount of feeling and imagery, something very important when writng poetry. The one thing I will say is that I feel ...

    Sep 23, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Fickle Promises...

    I could really feel the anger and distress in this poem. It worked really well. The simplicity of the style seemed to make this even more obvious. I liked the ...

    Sep 22, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Moments

    I really enjoyed this poem. I admit I didn't feel as much of the emotion as I had hoped, though I still understood the feeling the poem gave out. I ...

    Sep 22, 2008
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: random beginning of a story here

    hi Lozzen! I really enjoyed this first paragraph. The description was beautiful, and I could picture everything you wrote. I though the repetition worked well. In the next part, which ...

    Sep 21, 2008
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: fall away.

    I thought this poem was really meaningful and deep. I think a bit of punctuation could add to it, though I am unable to say where, so maybe it wouldn't. ...

    Sep 21, 2008
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: Mr. Perfect

    Hello. I really enjoyed this. I know it is only the beginning, but I can already feel the charactersiation. There were a few things that could be improved, such as ...

    Sep 21, 2008
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Alvalor

    Though I must agree with the above comments, as I don'treally know what this story is about yet, I stiil enjoyed it. Your style of writing is easy to read ...

    Sep 21, 2008
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: Life and all its random glory chapter 2

    I am entirely entrigued by your characters, as well as this parkour, skateboard, hill scenario. *hehe* Your characters description is subtle yet necessary. The fact that she knows which stairs ...

    Sep 16, 2008
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Our love will surely fly

    I really like this, it is unlike all of your other pieces.The rhyming comes easily and the rhythm is good. I can feel the emotion inside it. The variation in ...

    Sep 16, 2008
  • Short Story » General, General Re: To Love

    Wow, this was really good! I love the emotion you are able to spread, even if it is that of extreme sadness! It was incredibly hard not to cry as ...

    Sep 14, 2008


A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
— Steve Martin