miyaviloves

Ok i liked the start of this, the whole No giggling down the phone bit was good and original. But i didn't like the end. You kept the whole thing ...

Ok you have the tense a little bit all over the place here. He pets the beast gently This is happening as we read it, but... and slipped a soldier ...

Ok so this is about Warhammer? As i have never played it I can give you some feedback from just a reader! With their stealth camo activated, they were like ...

Will have to agree with Ofour on that one :S If you post loads of things at once people won't bother to read them all (like I havent) I notice ...

*is Happy because lot's have been posted* Yay for reaching the fifty page mark! And it's 50 pages of an actual good story, some people just write and write just ...

Er ok lol that was strange, but i liked it! Only one thing: I gave that nasty fruit To my enemy I left it in a boot And told it ...

hey, caught up with this all again. Gosh, another amazing piece! I love the relationship between Jon and Kyle, its so sweet and well (Im basically repeatng Rieda here) just ...

yay finally part 5!!!!! And yet again another brilliant instalment. I love how this is progressing, and how brave Lyla is. I'm glad that she is keeping the baby, and ...

Am I a toy to be plain with ^ Dream Deep pointed that bit out, but i don't know if you actually meant played with or what :S sorry easily ...

Dreg just wanted to be left along i think you mean alone there :) teeth jutted from his lower jaw but why. I'm not sure if you meant this as ...

OK, maybe everyone knows this: Beyonce's song played in my head as I turned to the left That Beyonce released a song that has the lines to the left in, ...

:( it's so sad :( all that i can say really :( Meevs x

Hmm...Ok i think I like this, I'm just going to rea it again... Yeah i like it :D But, its a prayer yes? I still don't really get it though, ...

Hmm its ok. five—no ten—dang, i know this her thought track but the dang just didn't sound right here. i think I have to agree with the others about there ...

hey Stefan! :D anyway here's the crit: His breathe became exhausted breathe crept closer I'm not sure if there should be an e on the end, is it breath? For ...