little.angelfire

To start off, I'd like to mention that I leave grammar and spelling corrections for other people to correct. I like to focus on the flow and description of the ...

Okay, so the following comments were little notes I put down as I was reading through it. They're just personal comments on some of your wording that I either like ...

brace yourself, I think this might be kinda harsh. I enjoyed your prologue, but I started reading this, and I didn't get very far at all. I stopped reading after ...

I liked most of it. Good description, and you do a pretty balanced job of showing rather than telling. The biggest problem I have is when you allow Hannah's hood ...

ahahaha, I liked this XD *is a fan of Twilight, though* Still made me giggle ^.~ Okay...this isn't really a critique or anything, but just a little pet peeve. Don't ...

alright, I didn't feel like reading the other crits, so sorry if I repeat something someone already said. "She is still studying for the test. And he’s a year older." ...

Isaiah jumped at the sound of Brian’s voice in his ear. “Oh my God,” he said. “We’ll never escape this house.” I think that that you should say he jumped ...

Note: I don't do grammar, but you've got LOTS of mistakes. XD Alright, right from the beginning you don't start off very strong. It reminds me of a middle schooler ...

I still looove your story Fleeeeeeeem!! ^.^ alright, here's what I have to say about it, though: I think you have to get the entire group more involved with what's ...

I'd have to agree with the repeated words. When writing in third person, you have to get creative with the way you word things so you don't use the same ...

*skips past grammar and spelling errors* not what I'm concerned about ^.~ Anyways, it's a good story. I was pleasantly surprised by how well you write for your young age. ...

oh my god kid!!! XD You're seriously messed up in the head or something XD Whatever it is you're taking, I want some ^.~ I love your story ^.^ (very ...

Oh my god!! XD I was just flipping through your prtofollio because I realized i'd never read any of your works before. I swear you had to have been under ...

I'm just going to jump right in. Hope you don't mind ^.^ This piece starts out quite well. It was nice and smooth, then got a little confusing as to ...

This piece is definetly short, sweet, and to the point. I think more detials, though, would really bring this piece to life. Since it's so short, and there's hardly any ...