ktarantino

These verses are filled with such great emotion; they scream out to the reader the pain and suffering of an end to any relationship! Great job capturing this emotion and ...

You have the beginning of a potentially interesting story line here. I'd work towards elaborating on your characters a bit more, and establishing your setting. You begin by talking about ...

This was actually just one of the first poems I ever worked with and it's been edited a couple times since which was three years ago. Thank you though!

Thanks! I agree that this could definitely use some voice work. This summer I'm trying to go back to all my older poems and improve them so I could definitely ...

Thank you!

Thanks for the review! I do have a tendency to ramble when I start "losing connection" and totally agree that the wordiness here needs some cutting down. I've gotten better ...