ktarantino

I think the structure of this piece more of a poem than a short story as you described it. I really like the overall message, and you give some great ...

I really loved the beginning of this poem; it really drew me in to read on. The overall tone was wonderful, and I loved that it was really dripping with ...

You have some good imagery and emotion here but the structure and grammar aspects are lacking big time! Remember to split your lines up and form stanzas--this helps the flow ...

First off, separate your paragraphs into the proper formatting so that you don't have anyone getting an eyesore. There are plenty of grammatical guidelines for this online, or maybe ask ...

I really like your overall metaphor of the broken piggy bank; it works well for you. I also particularly liked your use of specific details such as: to sleep away ...

What an awesome start for your first poem! You have a real talent for finding some stunning metaphors. I especially loved your two ending lines of your last stanza: I ...