confetti

This is really touching and easy to read. from your mistakes. that affect everyone else. here, you should either take away the period after 'mistakes' or replace the 'that' with ...

Aha, oh wow. This was really really damn good. It's captivating, and there's no doubt in my mind that I'll be reading the rest of your story. The only thing ...

There are four houses; Gryffendor, *Gryffindor Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. The hat came down on my head with a dusty whoof, and I could almost feel the consciousness in the ...

Just one more sip , I promised myself as the burgundy liquid fire swam ( some suggestions to make this flow smoothly: "as the fiery liquid swam down my throat" ...

This is wonderful, so touching and so accurate. It's a very relatable poem, for the most part anyways, which is probably what makes it so captivating. It had a good, ...

The little girl frowned slightly, the doll pausing as it trotted across a rock embedded in the grass. She’d heard people say that in the movies. When she’d asked her ...

Damn, this is amazing. I loved how the entire poem was a sort of metaphor. Or at least that's how I saw it. The girl is warmth, happiness, summer. She ...

“As we’ve said before Miss,” said the shorter yet bulkier of the two guards with a heavy sigh, “your uncle, the King James, has not given detail as to why ...

This interests me, but the fact that your characters have the same names as the Twilight characters is a bit of a turn-off. I feel like a lot of people ...

i physically not fight anymore. This line is sort of confusing. "Physically, I do not fight anymore" might make more sense, if that was what you were going for. amoungst ...

When I get home it’s gotten worse. Specks of dried blood cover the edges of her nostrils, rubbed raw from the constant presence of the handkerchiefs that lay balled up ...

Wow. Seriously, wow. Nothing has made me go from laughing as much as I was, to almost losing it and crying all over my keyboard. This was touching, or at ...

Best friends- The ones that you can only be mad for an hour because you have important stuff to tell them Best Friends- Only make you cry from laughing to ...

The first paragraph for this story did a really good job of sucking me in, props for that. Who can't resist a great beginning? It was Casey’s idea to start ...

After setting sail from Barbados on one of my father's insane hunts for treasure and feeling the salty wind in my hair, Adding the "and feeling the salty wind in ...