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Hello Magebird, “I wish Mom and Dad wouldn't wander off without me.” She was sitting outside of the comics museum, backpack balancing precariously in her lap. The museum wasn't exactly ...

Hello Magebird As promised, back immediately for chapter 2. Freddy's plans for the summer had never involved Wildegate, Connecticut. Said plans had actually involved going to the local con, working ...

Hi Magebird ^_^ I'm mostly reviewing this to get at your 3rd & 4th chapters which are untouched in the green room. I see that you want feedback on character ...

Hello Soulkana, I'm going to offer some honest feedback / advice. Jumping into my overall thoughts, I think that this piece was quite a slow, challenging read. By the end ...

Hello Piyali, I haven’t reviewed in a long time so might be a bit rusty ^_^ I’m glad you mentioned that you wrote this on your phone because that clued ...

I found this story tricky to immersive myself in, if I’m honest. Something that immediately jumps out at me when starting a story is how varied the sentences and paragraphs ...

Hello MissGangamash, I saw this in the greenroom. Interesting genre pairing. Let’s dive right in. It was around 10pm when Gabriel heard noises coming from Julian’s bedroom. This time there ...

Hey Felistia, I'll admit that I'm new to this story, but that's okay, because having read this piece through I mostly want to comment on line level stuff. ‘What’s she ...

Hey, just read this piece and thought I’d offer a few comments. First of all, you did a good job overall. I particularly like that you vary your sentence length ...

Hello Madagascar, I'm going to review this piece with a few simple bullet points of strengths / opportunities and ignore nitpicks involving grammar & punctuation. Strengths: -You've introduced central

Hey ^_^ Zoom here for a review. I’ll be brief and point out what needs improvement first, then end with some positives. Improvement points: 1) Please avoid publishing bold text. ...

Hello. Zoom here for a review. Spoiler: I enjoyed this! Part 1 The village was getting smaller. The forest beside it was getting bigger. Some would claim that this wasn't ...

Yaaaay Buffy. I'm totally here to stay haha. So this is a lot better than the previous chapter (not that the last one is bad, this is just better). Again ...

Hi Dottie, welcome to YWS. This is why I love Sam. Gotta love the Sam tantrums. A good thing you've done is establish a conflict off the bat (Sam not ...

Zoom here for a review. Welcome to YWS. I'm going to mention whatever jumps out at me. "Hold the line, backup squad retreat!" Commander Ren Drila screamed, as the giant ...