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Re: Taran Highflyer- part 1
Hi, Your story was (I thought) awesome. I was able to follow the plot easily and enjoyed the way it was written. You could use a bit more description, (I ...
Jul 20, 2009 -
Re: Life At 57, Fallidor Road: Chapter One.
Hi, I really liked the plot of your story (I think it has real potential!) The story moved a little fast, and I think it needs more description. Like what ...
Jul 20, 2009 -
Re: Leoragon, Dragon Fantasy! [Chap. 1]
Your story was kind of hard to read, and even harder to follow (sorry). I think you should slow down a little and take your time. The basic plot seemed ...
Jul 20, 2009 -
Re: Azula - Story of a Princess (Part 1)
Hi, I enjoyed reading this first part of your story immensely. I really like Avatar also. Your story kept true to the show while at the same time you're adding ...
Jul 19, 2009 -
Re: The Leading Man's Unlucky Loot (Chapter 1)
Hi, I enjoyed ready your story immensely. I really liked your idea of Sky pirates, (it's neat!) like Jetpack mentioned, you to slow down and smooth the plot out some. ...
Jul 19, 2009 -
Re: I can't think of a title. (any ideas)?
Hi, The story was ok, it just really needed a plot it didn't really go anywhere. The reader doesn't know like where they are, why they're there, or why someone ...
Jul 17, 2009 -
Re: Wolf Moon-Chapter 3: The Birth; 19 years ago
Hi, I really enjoyed reading all of the chapters in of your story so far. They're really good, and kept me engrossed till the end( I can't wait for more) ...
Jul 17, 2009 -
Re: Lila's troope of misfits
Hi, The story was alright, it felt like a tiny segment from a much larger story, It didn't really start or end any where, also it need more description about ...
Jul 17, 2009 -
Re: For the which path to take contest
Hi, Great story! I liked how you made it as if the girl was watching a scene from her past, neat idea. There were a couple sentences that didn't quite ...
Jul 17, 2009 -
Re: The Paper Shredder
Hi Dakota, I really liked this story. I love dogs so that might have been part of it. I like the way the story was written and the antics of ...
Jul 16, 2009 -
Re: Cinder:Prologue (In other words, My life in a nut shell)
Hi, I really enjoyed this piece of work. I like how you kept it interesting, and made it funny. I also like how it's a modern Cinderella Story turned upside ...
Jul 16, 2009 -
Re: Wyndolyn
Yay! Another competitor! Personally I really liked your story. I enjoyed the description, but then again I always put to much in my stories anyhow. I like where the story ...
Jul 16, 2009 -
Re: Alex the Queen; title in process
Hi, Great prologue! I really enjoyed it, just keep writing so we don't all die of anticipation. Please keep me posted on when you write more. Eagerly waiting ~Zanna P.S. ...
Jul 16, 2009 -
Re: Burning Past (makeshift title) A Short Story...
This is a really nice piece of writing. I enjoyed it immensely, especially your great description! :D The way you wrote it made it seem like it was a true ...
Jul 15, 2009 -
Re: Part 2 of The long night
This part also needs a lot of editing: Do you think that it will be possible to speak to her?” you could put 'would' instead of will. sure ill transfer.'I'll' ...
Jul 15, 2009
