Yuriiko

Hello there, Lily! First of all, I think this story lacks depth. The main character describes the snow and suddenly, the stabbing part seems like a slap on the face. ...

Hello there. It looks like you are a new member so being pretty harsh might not be a good thing. Since you posted this in poetry category, I hope you're ...

Hello there! Well, this is not bad but I'm not saying the opposite too. Yes, you have managed to place a bit of suspense or thrill although, it seems a ...

Hey there Jashy! Here as promised. EVERTYHING was darkness. I think the adjective "dark" can replace the word "darkness", since it actually describes "everything" and plus, it flows better. And ...

Hello there, Dragons! Here to review. "Roses... Flowers for love..." The girl said as she looked at the rose, Just remember that if you are placing a speech tag after ...

Hello there Anzius! Here as requested. :D The Japanese word “fear” is written as a demon wielding a whip. So meaning "fear" is a Japanese word? All loose hope in ...

Hello there! I have actually read the first part of your story and sorry to say, I've only noticed little improvement. But nonetheless, much better than before. The first problem ...

Hey there! Here to review. :3 When I opened my eyes, all I saw was light. Bright, blinding light. Not a very good opening line. It seems that the adjectives ...

Hello there Ann. Welcome to YWS! Since you are new here, I'll try to sound *gentle* as possible. :3 " Goodmorning , Love ." He said to me. Just as ...

Hello there! Here to review. “You died.” I answer calmly. His brown eyes fill with tears, “What about Mommy and Daddy?” The reaction seems a bit unrealistic and weak. If ...

Speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, let's welcome... Yuriiko! Me: Hi! *waves to thousands of fans* Fans: (real electricfans) swiiishhh... bzzz.... Me: Thank you guys for being such an inspiration--- ---- O

Hey there, Kyllorac! Here to review. :3 In that time before measure, Moon Mother blazed as brightly as Sun Father as they danced in the endless ocean that became sky. ...

Hello there! I see that you have tons of critiques already so I don't think I still need to do a line by line review. Here it goes. I can ...

Ash: Pokemon, I choose you! Me: *jumps out of the shell* Yuriiko Blast! Hello Ben! Here to review. :3 First of all, when I noticed that you requested a review, ...

Hello there! My general impression of this is that I find it a bit random, like you've written this on the spot. Not that it's a very bad thing, just ...