XxBrokenVainxX

Hello! The night is quiet, or so it seems. But I know better, than to trust my dreams. I like this first stanza very much, it does a great job ...

I was traveling threw a happy land, I think you mean through? listening to my favorite band. But I looked down and saw the sand, looking all dark and tanned. ...

Hello StoryWeaver13, first of all you have a very nice writing style, everything flowed rather nicely and if I do say so this is a wondrous first attempt. The imagery ...

Hi there! First off, I hope I don’t come off to mean. As i walked to the one I loved. All covered in blood. I cried in fear. But where ...

Hello! First of all, I like this and think its great for your age, I only a have a few nick picks I’d like to point out. ^^ Knowledge is ...

Hello! First off, let me say that I really like this piece and enjoyed it very much. Great job. Lost somewhere inside herself, She just can't be found, And it's ...

Hello! I hope I don’t come as too harsh. First of all, your title is what caught me. It isn’t written correctly. More Lust Then Greed. It should be “More ...

Hiya, So I have to agree with the majority of those who have commented before me. I think this seems more like preface than an actual chapter. It's a nice ...

Hiya, I’m Sam, I’ll try to help you out as much as I can alright? I hope I don’t come off too harsh! Was it supposed to be this way ...

Hiya, I’m Sam, I hope I don’t come across as too cruel! Good luck. :) It's on the streets, In people you meet, Even in those heartless souls. When it ...

Wow, that's really good. I checked it out because i've been wanting to check out the type of stories Anne Rice wrote. This is a really, really good fanfic, and ...

Hiya. ^^ I’m Sam. I’m a little new at this and I hope I don’t sound too harsh. Let me know if I am please. ^^ The number one reason ...

Hiya ^^ I’m Sam. I’m a little new at this, but I’ll try my best to be of as much help as possible. I don’t like being harsh so if ...

Hiya. ^^ I like this so far, just a few mistakes. The others have caught most of them, but your first sentence is driving me nuts! "Daniel Pearce. You could ...

Hiya. ^^ I enjoyed this very much. there isnt' much I can say that others haven't already. I would like to suggest not having long parts of your story in ...