Writersdomain

I liked Lord of the Flies. It is very thought-provoking and worth the read. Read it. :D

I have a really hard time with those two things too, so I know what you mean. I find that going and back cutting something to its bare bones, then ...

Chapter 5 continued Creiha laughed and pointed to the canopy of tree branches above them, relishing the sunshine on her face and the web-like pattern of shadows cast upon the ...

Thanks for reading this, Dark Lordess. :D Chapter 5 won't be up for a while, because I have promised myself I will reach the turning point of the second book ...

Hey Jig! I really liked your first and second chapters. Your pace is very steady and your writing style shines. Kay is very well developed and I liked your descriptions ...

Creiha did not sleep; she only lay on her cot and stared at the tear-streaked window near her, the rippling moonlight casting a pallid hue over her face as the ...

:) For the half-whispered, half-ordered thing? Well, I'm sure I don't hear Addo's voice the way you do, so I can't think of anything off the top of my head. ...

Markus's eyes are supposed to be olive-colored. :wink:

Chapter 4 continued Captain Sophie Pierce stormed through the jail doors, her doe brown hair spilling onto her shoulders and framing her flushed face. Her two most trusted guards stumbled ...

Haha... totally didnt' see the other two sections. I'll look at those too... Rone walked slowly, turning around constantly[and] scanning the area looking for traps (this is a lot. splitting ...

The revised version is much, much better. Your pace is more realistic and you have given us some profound insights into your characters - loads better. Just a little nitpickiness... ...

Thanks for the comment, Shriek! I'll work on those adjectives - still recovering from my adjective binge. :wink: Ah, predictability. Fear not. Strick and Creiha do not hit off a ...

Thanks so much, Dark Lordess. :wink: If anyone could give me some character impressions (you don't even have to critique it, or even read the previous chapters... though that would ...

So, I'm cutting chapter 3 down 'cause it's too long, Here is the last scene of chapter 3 - one of my favorites. Last section of chapter 3 Strick led ...

Chapter 3 continued Morning came, and the sun peered through the clouds for the first time in a few days; a sheer film of mud smudged Creiha’s window, but light ...