Wolf

:D Azila >> thank-you so much! That really helped, and I'll make the changes right away. =) Fall_Into_The_Sky >> thanks! I'll fix those things ASAP. Yes! And guess what? This ...

Thanks so much, Prokar! That did help, more than a bit -- a lot! :D And yeah, you can still call me Ayra. ;p I'll be fixing those things right ...

Back again. :) "What do you want henchman?" The tallest snapped, crinkling his nose up in disgust. "The girl, what do you wish me to do with her?" The bulky ...

Wow, thank you for the awesome critiques! =) They really helped. Ill work on nit-picks now, and today, I'll try to make the characters more... characterized, lol. And I think ...

I'll make it Lyla. :D That's a good idea about having her struggle through the day. I'll write something tonight and post it tomorrow! I know, me two, but we ...

Sure! :D I come forwards to investigate only to be pushed to the floor and beaten. 'pushed' should be 'pushes'. I forgot that last time. ;p The girl dodged between ...

Thanks so much, ning! =) Hehe, Lila is pronounced LIE-LA. But I can still change it if you want. XD You tend to use '--' a lot, would you mind ...

Hey! :D I did promise to review this, so I will. I'll do it paragraph-by-paragraph. PARAGRAPH #1: The sun dropped down, and the world was plunged in darkness. The New ...

Thanks, lupis! :D Actually, I do have more posted. It's the 'NN -- Prologue' in my portfolio. XD It's the complete prologue, this and another longer bit. - Camille xx

I'm glad it helped. :D The example? Sure, you can use it! I don't mind. And she's naked? *dies* Oh well, I suppose that's alright as long as you don't ...

Many thanks to you both! :D Ning >> thanks! I'll change those things in my rewrite. =) RedWing >> you're right, I should change that. Thanks for your comments! Cheers, ...

Hehe, that sounds like fun! :) I love writing flashbacks. This is just the first part. There's a second, in which Isaria is asking Guinevere to go and enroll as ...

Thank-you! :D Don't worry, the style is only for the prologue. And maybe some flashbacks, but I'm not sure.

*glomps* Thanks so much, Andy! That was a really helpful critique. :) If you are planning on rewriting this (which I hope you do), I suggest that you focus more ...

Thanks Aedomir! I do see what you mean about it being cliché. >.< I'm not sure what to do about it, though. Anyways. Do you think I should continue this? ...