-
Re: Laying on the Floor
Yes. I like. Some lines still seem a bit long for the piece. but indentation of some of the smaller lines might give it a good look too. (unfortunanly indentation ...
Dec 9, 2004 -
Re: The Sun Prophet Chapter 1, 2, 3 and 4
I was wondering if 'grey' meant 'gray' to us weird folks. It does. I'll add that to my list. 1) civilised, civilized *note Fire is English. He uses a purer ...
Dec 9, 2004 -
Re: Due to popular demand a Doki Doki follow-up
hm...very intriguing...thats all i can really say...intriguing. when it comes to stories, however, im not necessarily good with commenting and suggesting. however, the way that the characters talk see
Dec 9, 2004 -
Re: School Spirit
Sorry to triple post, but I want to put up another chapter. 4. Marie’s eyes widened and her body erupted in a cold sweat as if she had just awakened ...
Dec 5, 2004 -
Re: School Spirit
I have an idea of where you're going with the song, and i like it. have you considered making the year of it's release be the year of Hana's death? ...
Dec 5, 2004 -
Re: School Spirit
3 You know nothing about me . The words came again on a cold breeze. It was five minutes after midnight when Jason formed the rift between the mortal world ...
Dec 4, 2004 -
Re: Doki Doki ~ Disclaimer: Rated R
First of all I'm glad you enjoyed it. Its the only piece of flash fiction I've ever written that I actually like. Actually I'm sorry to say that this is ...
Dec 3, 2004 -
Re: School Spirit
2. The main football field was lit by the half faded moon in the blue night sky. The four wanderers made a noisy clank, clank as they walked across the ...
Dec 2, 2004 -
Re: School Spirit
That poem is a song. Its kind of an alllusion to The Breakfast Club. And it comes up later.
Dec 2, 2004 -
Re: Terry Pratchet
And here I thought I didn't understand Color of Magic because I was a dumb American.
Nov 30, 2004 -
Re: The Sun Prophet
Fair enough. Part of critiques is knowing that you don't have to do everything that everyone suggests.
Nov 30, 2004 -
Re: Jilly (may offend)
Oh my God! That was terrible! And I amost hate myself because I can't stop laughing about it. "When I shot it came out her nose." Man that's some messed ...
Nov 30, 2004 -
Re: Terry Pratchet
I read Color of Magic and was amused. Unfortunatly I have a couple of friends who will not SHUT UP about Terry Pratchet and as a result I'm totally burnt ...
Nov 30, 2004 -
Re: School aka Prison
YAY! I like Codename: Kids Next Door! Its good that cartoons are actually doing something to promote creativity rather than quell it.
Nov 30, 2004