Twinflower

Very sad but very good too. I liked the description of the vanity up to the "Nail polish - both glittered and non glittered." part. I don't know, but it ...

This has a very beautiful mood to it...sort of like wandering thoughts, but with a solid meaning to it. I especially liked the description of the gate, and I love ...

This had some good ideas in it. The main thing I think you should do is go back over it and add to it. Then it could be a great ...

Very nice imagery. I agree that the apostrophe (apostowotsie?? :D ) in "fright'ning" disrupts the flow. Just putting "frightening" is fine. I think, when you say "the trees hushed" you ...

This is a pretty good start. You got me wondering where this story is going to go. I got the sense that the girl wasn't all that welcome in her ...

This is a good poem--I like how the mood is dark and desperate until the last stanza, when everything is resolved. I liked the first stanza a lot, with the ...

The prologue/first paragraph was a little brutal, but good. I really enjoyed the description at the beginning, but I think you should try and incorporate your description in with some ...

This poem has a very good mood and tone to it. I could sense the narrater's emotions and her longing/confusion about whether he was with her still or not. I ...

This was really powerful and it made me sad. But I like sad things :D The lines and words flowed together well and the pace of it seemed just right ...

This had a lot of good description, but at first I wasn't sure why you spent so much time talking about the James character when he dies right away in ...

This was fun, but the formatting and grammar/ spelling mistakes made it hard to read. :? Otherwise, I liked it. I liked the difference between the popular bad kids and ...

Hi there, This was quite good, in my opinion. Your description is very well done and your character is interesting, as well as the mystery surrounding her. Just a couple ...

Hi Fuffy, This is a really good beginning for a story. I think you had enough detail, but if you feel like you need to add more, maybe you could ...