ThanatosPrinciple

This is really simple writing, which is good. It makes the story really good, taking into account that you're able to create an interesting environment and a fascinating character...all which ...

Sorry everyone. I just realized. There's part of this story that won't make sense: aka the part with the guy and the lightning bolt. Sorry. This story may be continued, ...

I agree. And I also LOVE the generator! Some weird stuff like this comes out a lot, yeah, but it's really interesting that way! Oh, FYI, at the end, the ...

I forgot to mention it in the review, but spacing is a big problem. You can't review a story if it's too hard to read.

Actually, it IS an information sheet! I had to write this for Social Studies, so all the numbers, endless facts and others seriously need to be edited out!

There's a serious amount of proper spacing that needs to get done. I find it hard to critique when it's all in a huge, menacing mass.

You seem fairly new, and at YWS we have a 2-1 posting ratio. For every two reviews, you post some of your writing. More people will review and critique your ...

:smt041 :smt040 I thought this was well written. just a few things. You say "to" instead of "too" in the first paragraph. If you want to get something published in ...

Good story, kind of graphic.

I think you should elaborate on where Putney is in the beginning. Besides that, good start :smt080

Whoa that is so... creepy! How old is she? 7, 8?

This is a good start. However, it was hard to understand what was going on. Also the writing was too grouped together, which made it hard to read. Another thing ...

Whoa, that's really creepy. I would hate to be locked up by myself, all alone! Very good words and similies. Creeeeeeepy! Cool I liked it!

Cool how "it all started with a can of coke" I like how simple things can become poems and rhymes. Good one. Hope I can read more of what you ...

Cool how "it all started with a can of coke" I like how simple things can become poems and rhymes. Good one. Hope I can read more of what you ...