Tenyo

If it was longer I would have found the questions nausiating, but I didn't think it was so bad. That last line got me; it was sweet, but in a ...

I will praise you for trying the acrostic. No, not trying, doing. I'd say you've written this and pulled it off really well. I also really like how the poem ...

I agree that there was a very good hook to this. I'm really curios about what happens next. The thing that stood out a bit too much was the crying. ...

In general, I found it quite scary... Perhaps not in a good way. This whole poem had a very evil vibe to it, and it made me feel uncomfortable. The ...

Haha, that's awesome. The whole thing is quite bitter. You've bluntly insulted your reader, and done it in a way that's so brilliant you can get away with it; I ...

That's so sweet :) I can't really pick out anything wrong with the piece. It's quite wonderful, the only thing I'd suggest is to add a bit more description to ...

It's rare to find a poem that involves family problems, eating disorders and self mutilation, that doesn't scream out emoism. This is actually quite far from emo. I like the ...

My first and main suggestion for this is to proof read, a lot. I don't usually complain about bad spelling, but this is full of typing errors that, if you ...

Ello :) Okay, first glance, the layout looks pretty good. The paragraphs are varied and it doesn't look too bulky to read. I like the characters already, even without reading ...

I like it. I generally and strongly perfer fantasy or sci-fi genres, but this one sounds interesting. Catalina intrigues me. Combining a few of the details you've given I imagine ...

Aww :( I think the fact that this is addressed to a parent makes it so much more touching, especially with that line 'I'll always love you.' It's like... pleading, ...

How nostalgic... I really like this, though I can't pinpoint why. "Once Upon a Time, I remember not knowing / not knowing that one day I'd look back," That line ...

Part 2 :D Okay, serious critique time. Be careful where you're putting the commas, especially in the beginning. Try not to overuse them or put them in unnecessary places. The ...

Hello :) At first glance this looks quite daunting. It's really long and has a lot of dialogue. Variation is essential in keeping things interesting, even if it is just ...

I'm impressed! Especially since I didn't actually realise you didn't use the word 'the.' You managed it seamlessly. My only issue is that the dialogue in this is a little ...