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Sureal

  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Beggar's Utopia -- Chapter Four

    Nitty-picks: in which the man assented, by raising all four of his eyebrows. Four eyebrows? ‘Put these on.’ Logan was suddenly aware of the man rushing around the house, thrusting ...

    Jan 5, 2009
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Just another Vamp tale - worth a critique even tho its short

    Hi there. =) It's a bit ... short. It's kindda hard to review it, because of this. I do have two comments though: 1) Beware of purple prose. Purple prose ...

    Dec 31, 2008
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: Darren Shan Saga

    Jiggity, I wouldn't bother with the rest of the books in the Demonata series. It peaked with the first two books, and the rest range from 'okay-ish' to 'poor'. Well, ...

    Dec 30, 2008
  • Short Story » Science Fiction, General Re: Stars, pt. 3

    Keep you’re head down and just do the job, my sister had always said. Your. ‘part from pointing that out, I don’t really have anything else to say that hasn’t ...

    Dec 28, 2008
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Beggar's Utopia -- Chapter Three

    Me again. =) No real nitpicks here, so I’ll go straight into the general comments: First off, I don’t like his name either. XD I couldn’t figure out how to ...

    Dec 28, 2008
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Beggar's Utopia -- Chapter Two

    Alrighty. =) Sorry it took me so long, but I had work to do, and then I had to move back home for the holiday, and then I found I ...

    Dec 28, 2008
  • Other » General, General Re: My query letter

    To be completely honest, I found this part of the origional to be more compelling (especially the bolded part): When Marc is separated from Nessie, a wrong turn takes her ...

    Dec 1, 2008
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Beggar's Utopia -- Chapter One

    w00t, Blink wrote something! =) Right, I’ll start off with a few quick observations: He came running to the bridge direly, Direly? That’s an unusual word to use. Not sure ...

    Nov 22, 2008
  • Short Story » Science Fiction, General Re: Stars, pt. 2

    And it's me again: Before I could even begin to eat, the ship began to shake and roar. Plates and spoons began to rattle and clank, creating a momentarily deafening ...

    Nov 21, 2008
  • Short Story » Science Fiction, General Re: Stars, pt. 1

    Yay, I love reading stuff by you. =) Anyway, thoughts: The sky above bristled with foreign, hostile constellations; a bitter reminder of how far I was from home and one ...

    Nov 21, 2008
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: truth seaker

    First thing first: just so you know, YWS has a 2:1 rule. That is to say, for every one story/poem you post up, should first write two reviews. This helps ...

    Nov 12, 2008
  • Article / Essay » Review, General Re: Anne Rice?

    I'm not sure how much you can compare them. I haven't read either series, but I know they're aimed at different audiences. Anne Rice's books detail with more complex ideas ...

    Oct 26, 2008
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, General Re: Looking Glass Prologue

    Hey there Kaylyn. =) Caolyn walked up the woman, intending to buy it. I’m assuming you meant that she walked up TO the woman, not that she walked up the ...

    Sep 10, 2008
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: A Tale

    Oh my, how is it that no one has commented on this yet? “It is one of the old gods,” they whispered when he stepped into the room. This is ...

    Sep 9, 2008
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Alexandrite

    She hoped it was expensive, her mother told her not to try to spend too much today. This sentence is actually grammatically incorrect. It’s what we call a comma splice, ...

    Sep 8, 2008


The words you speak become the house you live in.
— Hafiz