Sureal

Some quick thoughts: -> Repetition is great. It's one of my favourite writing techniques. However, that said, I'm not sure that 'Because I am fearful' is necessarily the best phrase ...

Some quick thoughts: -> The first paragraph is written from Innusha’s point of view, but the rest of the chapter appears to be written from Baird’s. Whilst it is technically ...

Hi there, abelgaiya! What I'm going to do with this review is suggest some ways in which I think this story could be improved. Most of it is going to ...

A sad story, with technically sound prose, except ... almost the entirety of the story is told, rather than shown. This is where 'show, don't tell', comes in. In other ...

My thoughts are as follows: 1) I don't find Lacretia's behaviour to be believable. Her father is currently risking his life in a dangerous battle, and she barely seems concerned ...

Hey, welcome to the site. =) For an opening to a novel (I assume this is a novel?) this is all a bit too slow for my tastes. Nothing actually ...

Hi there, JapaneseNinja! Welcome to the site. =) This is an intriguing opening you have here, but I think it needs some touching up. 1) First thing is, I'm left ...

Hello! I like this. You've captured a very short moment in time, and I think you've done it well. The story is haunting and emotional, without any of the sort ...

Heya, WritingSpitfire! You're probably gonna find this particular piece of advice somewhat frustrating, but it is what I think, and I do honestly believe it'll make your novel better. This ...

Wow, you’re a fantastic writer. I wish I were as talented as you when I was your age. If you don’t carry on practicing and getting better I shall have ...

’ello, Jigster! Told you I’d get around to reviewing Maharaj eventually. ;) Anyway, whilst your writing is all very good, and you got a great imagination, and all that other ...

Um ... probably not the best choice of play to review? It's 5 years old, and Emma doesn't visit the site no more. Best way to review new work, I ...

Hello there, jessabelle4C. =) Just a few quick comments: Right, first off you have some bizarre things going on with your tense - it swaps every few words between the ...

Been flicking through her website. Looks really professional. Oh my god at the reviews, though. Ended up finding my way to her Facebook page. You guys made my day. To ...

Hey Silversun. ^_^ Some specific observations: It was ironic that a town full of trained killers was surrounded by a beautiful landscape. Not sure that is really ironic. Example of ...