Stealth_Slicer

Hello jDawn, I'm Stealth_Slicer. I like it so far but your writing needs work (No offence :) ). I went through and ironed it out a bit for you, corrections ...

Ok I haven’t read it yet but I instantly need to say one thing: Big block of text = bad Huge block of text = very bad, and it is ...

I think that it was superb. I like the way you incorporate different ideas, and blend them together. Another think I like is the way the events are similar to ...

Ok my first time doing this so I would get someone else to check it too. Corrections are in bold, and notes are in italics. I am not good with ...

Ok I’m still reading, but I am still a bit confused by the changes each chapter. I hope that you go back to other characters soon. I think my favourite ...

Ok I am still a bit confused wit hall the skipping but still very good. One thing I noticed is you changed the title from: Chapter (1-5) of "Tainted Life" ...

I liked the idea of an organisation that trains kids to be superhuman, or as you said “Moulds” the kids into super humans. I liked the idea that the character ...

Interesting, its good to see you have gone back and are continuing on from were you left off from one of the characters. Perhaps describe the mass more so readers ...

I liked it but it wasn’t really my thing. I am glad you didn’t give away her power because that is what keeps the reader in suspense, and I rely ...

The descriptions were very good and I could picture it very well. I hope you do write more. I am someone who likes some background, as to what is going ...

This was better but I still think more physical description is needed. Also I don’t really understand all this skipping from one character to another each chapter. I think you ...

Its good I just spotted a typo in your work that you might want to just quickly edit some time: Posters were every where asking man to join the new ...

This reminds me strongly of all the zombie games and films EG Left 4 Dead and I am legend. I like the entire essence of survival but I didn’t feel ...

Ok to start off with you begin talking about on of the alien races of your piece. However you don’t include any description of them, back-story yes but not description. ...

I thought it was all right I don’t think I will read much if any more of this series if it becomes one. Not saying I wont read it because ...