Squall

Hey there Jared. There was a fire in the sky. Big. Bright. It swallowed up the stars and heaven like a fat, white man. Haha, this made my night. “What’re ...

Hey there Icefire63111. I began walking down the side walk, not caring where I went or when I`d be there. Why was the narrator not caring? Be more specific. Jenny ...

Hey there Fellow. The apparent stillness was broken by the chaotically dance of the shadows. The light could barely pierce through the darkness. Chaotic. And also, do shadows dance? Not ...

Hey there Pawprint. My fingers easily sliced through the warm sand. Each grain just slipped through, never to be caught. The sun was high overhead, warming my dark hair. Your ...

Hey there Tabithalillian. I walked as if I was in a dream. How does it feel like walking in a dream? Be more specific. I felt as though I were ...

Hey there JC, I am back once again to review your work. He didn’t have an answer for that, and I found myself crying harder. I never cried. Ever. Quite ...

Hi again KJ. Before I start, I would like to apologize if I may had seemed harsh yesterday, but I did it because I'm here to help. What's the point ...

Hey there Xena, haven't seen much of you around the site. As the name hints, Zompira is half vampire and half zombie. When you mentioned that, I literally cringed. How ...

Hey there Freeman, and welcome to YWS. I hope you will enjoy your stay here. It was a chilly afternoon, staring out at the blood red sunset, tinting the sky ...

Hey there Danny, and welcome to YWS. It was cold. It was always cold here. Yet surprisingly it was also muggy. The place had a great way of making you ...

Yay Rieda! It's been a while. I don’t come here from behind mellowed pink serene silk behind cheap shower glass; I quite like your use of lines here. Having the ...

Hello there KJ. What's up? The first step I took into Lugosi was one of determination and anger. Being the new kid always sucks, but I should have been used ...

Hello Ash. It was in the middle of the night. Describe the night more. It was a cheap, dirty place. How? Describe. She looked out of the window, observing the ...

Hey lucyy. I don't think you need a preface. All this can be shown in the first chapter of your novel. Why would need to introduce to us prior to ...

Hey there Nariel. Firstly, you do not need the prologue. A prologue should only to provide historical background information of a novel prior to the start. (and even then, I ...