Sorsha2

You know, you don't need to create a new post everytime you update/edit a piece. Just recopy the new text in the origional body and maintain the origional post - ...

Hello *waves* Hm. Okay, I agree with the other reviewers. Incredibly short - especially for a prologue. I think anything less then 2/3rds of a page is a waste and ...

Hello What I noticed (more then anything else) is the lack of description in the first part. You give us their eyes, and the occassional hair color, but not much ...

Hello, it appears you are to be my victim for the day *mwahahahahahaha* lol Kidding. Okay *cracks knuckles* There is a lot of potential for this piece, if you expand ...

Hey Ally, This is my frist review of your work so I will try to be gentle. I found a looooot of redundancies with word usage. ie: Its sweet eyes ...

Hi Cat, welcome to YWS I have to agree with the previous poster. The thing this piece is lacking hte most is description and without it, I'm afraid, we as ...

Hello Moira, Just a couple of quick observations: 1) I think the fact that Jo is quick to call her father insane/daft/etc is tad bit too harsh, especially since it ...

Hi Moirah, Your piece caught my eye so here is my reivew, if I appear a bit blunt I apologize :P I found a few things sounded/ or seemed a ...

hello, Okay, here is what I noticed right off the bat. In a small and simple village called Shelton, there lived a sixteen year old boy named Clover . Clover ...

It was a pretty good start, my only critique is there were a lot of redundancies as far as word usage. Every few days, when Sol is in the middle ...

Ok. I am all for writing to make yourself happy. But this site is about serious writing that you want to stand behind because you have dreams/aspirations to see the ...

.... omg. Dude - I am blown away. I loved this - and if you check my reviews you'll see that I'm pretty sparing with high praise until I am ...

FINALLY!!!! Action! Intrigue! Danger! Glowing WEEDS!!! (Meh?) lol Okay - THIS is what should have been introducted soooooo much sooner. I can appreciate you wanting to really outline the life ...

It's not a bad start but plotwise its a bit vague. Then again, I suppose in the first chapter thats bound to almost always be the case :P Also, for ...

Okay, I was reading your piece and for someone so young I am blown away by your writing abilities - though it was far from perfect (grammatically speaking) its incredible ...