Snoink

Instead of saying "Faulk," consider: "Faulking tap dancing elephants in pink tutus of the nth dimensional portal coming out to kill us why why why!" Good luck with nanowrimo! :D

Hey, cool it guys! ;) Anyway, as far as your poem... I was a bit confused by the reference of "Ithaka." To me, your epigraph seemed out of place and ...

This may sound surprising, but each of these questions can be a complete basis for a new poem. Awesome, no? ;) It's great that you are asking all these questions ...

You start off strong and with attitude (which I always like) but then you started listing weird-sounding desserts, which was very off-putting. True, you had some commentary attached to the ...

Hey Kookie! When writing poetry, you want to catch your read off guard. Make them a little off-balance, surprise them with the power of your words... make them drunk with ...

This is awful. Its entire purpose as a poem is to preach and rant. It has neither introduction or conclusion. Worst yet, it flip-flops and uses imprecise language to persuade... ...

What I don't quite understand is what is the timing of this piece? Usually, in poems about trees, the trees get older and wiser, but this tree seems to be ...

This looks to be one of those works that you tried to make it sound all artsy because you made something slightly pretty and then decided, "Hey! It's too pretty! ...

It doesn't quite sound like the dancer in the story. I mean, you have a strict format to work with, but you can tweak it so that the story is ...

OMG! OMG! You're back! :D I've missed you and your pretty poetry! Except this wasn't pretty... very gritty. I pretty much loved it and its dirtiness. Lovely stuff! A grammar ...

Hello and welcome to YWS! The other guys were right! There were a lot of grammatical errors, but they can be easily fixed. Just take the time and fix it. ...

But... does it coil... like a snake? ;) But yeah... I totally know what's going to happen next (and yes, the spoilers are spoilers for a reason... they will curdle ...

LOL! Still trying to argue with your reviewers, eh? When will you ever learn? ;) So... this isn't going to be a review. Really. Because it's late and stuff and ...

I was wondering when you would post this! Just a couple of comments before the actual critique: -> Try not to use the passive voice. When you say, "my fingers ...

Generally, poetry is written to dig further into a subject rather than to gloss over it. ;) A cliche that comes to mind is, "Write what you know." As you ...