SeraphTree

:D:D Tears escaped from my eyes, and I didn't like it so became my emo self again and released my pocket knife from my pocket to slit my wrist to ...

Interesting. :D I think you could be a bit more descriptive in the verses. :D Thats all I can think of :D :smt051 *Seraph*

Interesting. :D To get to the light, the This line messed up your flow in the verse. Running around in the midnight moons’ light, This is rather a mouthful. I ...

Interesting. The middle was the best in my opinion, because of imagery. There were a few part that were confusing, but they are easily fixable. :D The beginning and end ...

It is hidden deep down in my h e art. I must agree with Syd. Because of the random caps and the punctuation, this makes it sound like 'poor me' ...

I agree with Amelia. Instead of saying 'orange hurts my eyes,' say 'GAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! TURN IT OFF TURN IT OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!' Put her in a normal situation. School, dance, etc... maybe the ...

:D:D:D * “Nice phone.” She admired. “Where’d you get it?” Luc studied his phone. “This?” he asked. “My dad got it…” he swallowed and rubbed his forehead, closing his eyes. ...

I will crit this. :D It's just getting a little late. :( :D:D:D:D:D

Please space between paragraphs. :D Then I will crit. :D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Interesting. It reminds me of Orinoco Flow, by Enya. :D:D:D Keep writing I thoroughly enjoyed it. :D

:D Luc bit his tongue as he strode over to his locker. No crying, he told himself. The last thing you need is to be sent home again. A tear ...

Please space between your paragraphs. :D Then I will crit. :D:D:D

Just a few things I noticed :D I open my eyes to see a man cloaked in white fire. His clothes are white (white as the moon that spits waves ...

What up Author ^o^V The train rolled up and he knew he could get on it, it wasn’t the train he was waiting for, but if he got on it ...

This is a lot of telling. I wake up in a car. She’s playing radio static again. Grey everywhere. Turn it down, I tell her. She turns it down. I ...