PirateQueen

You don't really describe Flara Sanchez or Blakleigh Evans. All I know is that Flara has a manicure and Blakleigh has green eyes. Other than that it's a pretty decent ...

I'm not going to point out the grammar mistakes since everyone else already has. I've never read a story about circus performers so this a good and new idea. You ...

It's a good start and I will be looking foreward to reading more. Other than the paragraphs crammed togther which you already explained, there are a few other typos. Also ...

They were a few typos like Her grin on his hand and shoulder were like stone. It should be grip not grin. I'm not a huge fan of fantasy, but ...

I liked it. It was very pretty and the magpie wanted to take it to make her nest. I think you can find a better description than "very pretty" not ...

Good start to the story. You need to make it more clear about who's talking. Aslo i would suggest using less exclaimation points because with over use they tend to ...

Well done. I would have liked to know more about Jacob and why a person had threatened Maggie. Interesting ending and I mean that in a good way. I didn't ...

I loved it! Other than some typos it was great. I liked how you made liza and ellie like different people. Aslo it would have been nice to know a ...

Wow this was really good. And to think I almost thought the kid was going to be eaten hehe i really loved how it flowed. "What is it?" They scream, ...