PerforatedxHearts

I lovelovelove the voice. Sounds like a reasonable sort of person, ya' know? This was niice. Good job. And I love the title, it's very catchy.

The paragraphs are...creepy. Weird. Very awkward to read. So change that, and like Azila, then I'll read it.

The description is good. there a point to this?

I loved this song. I had it stuck in my head for awhile.

Ditto everyone. This sounds more like a Chicken Soup for the Lover's Soul, or whatever. Make it sound like an actual story , not a come-and-go thing. That's what I ...

Oh, and by the way? You don't need to bold the font. It's got enough to stand on its own, darling. ;) --seree.

Ooh. I see. Yeah, I was trying to have him say "hi" without sounding cliche or awkward. XD And yes, the last part was the hardest to do. I was ...

I'm a bit confused. So you're saying that you don't get that she's psychic? The extra space was a typo thing. For some reason, I can't correct it. And.. He's ...

-dies- The first critique, and it's awesome! I knew I needed to work on the pyschic community a bit more, but I hate wordcount frames. Thank you so much. This ...

Okay. Thank you! I've changed my focus to another story, quite sadly. XD But the voice is a lot like the new prologue, just a bit more thoughtful and in ...

Yep. I realized that. XD *crosses fingers behind back*

Thank you so much! :]

Ditto. By the way, this is a fanfiction story, darling. Move it to the fanfiction board.

Ditto Aet. [because I'm so lazy]. Plus, I'd think that this was a very, very, very short short story that didn't really end in the first place. So is this ...

Yeah, my Word won't do any spellcheck or grammar correcting, and I've tried constantly to change it, but the only way it'll do that stuff is if i get a ...