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Re: Wordsmithing—Story is Dead
The concepts that you're dealing with here fascinate me, and I think you expressed the problems that arise when contemplating a world that, in the grand scheme of things, doesn't ...
Jan 28, 2018 -
Re: Azarel
I like this story a lot. You play Azarel's love of the Bible against Lena's drunkenness very well. The capitalization of Him was cool as well and worked well with ...
Jan 28, 2018 -
Re: Gemini // Ex Libris - pt.1
I love how lyrical this piece is. A couple of lines stood out to me as being incredibly well-crafted: "A belief of a large cosmic order governing the wild chaotic ...
Jan 28, 2018 -
Re: Spruce Woods (The Eastcliff Series #1) - Chapter 52
I agree with a lot of the things BlueAfrica has said. Your characters are certainly compelling, and you could clearly have them bounce off each other for pages and pages ...
Jan 28, 2018 -
Re: Spruce Woods (The Eastcliff Series #1) - Chapter 51
Good work! This was very well-written, and even not having read any of the previous chapters, I understood what was happening very well. I really like Tiffany's internal conflict in ...
Jan 28, 2018 -
Re: [Insert Title Here] - Part 2
Even not having read Part 1 of this short story, I did enjoy this. It certainly is intriguing, and I'm excited about future installments. There were a couple of glaring ...
Jan 28, 2018 -
Re: Wordsmithing—The Modern Gods
This piece was fascinating to me, in a very good way. You did a good job of making me question the "modern gods" in my life, and I commend you ...
Jan 28, 2018 -
Re: Gilbert's Interview with God
Very good! I really enjoyed your exploration of this premise. I'd never considered writing about a religious person's interview with God, and you did it really well here. I do ...
Jan 18, 2018 -
Re: An Apartment Conversation.
I really like this piece. Endlessly inventive; in fact, I think you even cram too many jokes into under a thousand words. My advice is going to overlap with Carina's, ...
Jan 18, 2018 -
Re: Life: Commentated (part two)
Just like Part One, this is endlessly inventive. I love the way you poke fun at the conventions of TV and the media in general in a way that isn't ...
Jan 18, 2018 -
Re: Life: Commentated
This is fantastic. Just so flat-out entertaining, and most of this is due to your hilarious and original premise. You should really label this as a satire (in addition to ...
Jan 18, 2018 -
Re: Icarus Girl
Fabulous work! It's hard to "write chemistry" between people, but you did a very good job here. My favorite line is "God Elle, it was like a slap in the ...
Jan 16, 2018 -
Re: 2.
Wow! This really blew me away. I think horror is very hard to do, especially this kind of more contemplative version, and you really pulled it off. As for general ...
Jan 16, 2018 -
Re: Boris Elton Humphrey [esquire]
Fantastic work. It does what it's trying to do really well, and it was a very entertaining read. I especially love the [esquire] add-in, and your descriptions are specific enough ...
Jan 16, 2018 -
Re: Blue Cell Phone
This story is pretty hard to pass judgment on. I did enjoy reading it and it kept me very entertained, but in the other hand, it has some big flaws ...
Sep 30, 2017
