LovexPeacexRandomx3

“Princess Anita! Oh my, we must appear to be fools, don’t we?” the girl said . “Please don’t mind us. We are only eavesdropping!” a giggling girl said . “Molly! ...

I like this story so far--besides the grammar and spelling mistakes. Others have already pointed that out, so I have a suggestion. Wouldn't the cops be suspicious of Tim...? I ...

Six years before. no later than 2 months ago Are you going to use digits or spell out the numbers? Choose one. Normally, you spell out the numbers, but it's ...

I lid down on the bed That should be lied. “This could get interesting.” I thought. Maybe you should put the thoughts in italics--just a suggestion, though. Anyways, I love ...

I wanted to slap him so bad . That should be badly. Sorry, that's all I could find wrong in this piece. Anyways, I can't wait until the first chapter ...

I like this story, I do. But you're kind of confusing me. :smt102 Explain more in chapter 9? Yay! :smt005

My head.... Oh, god, my head.... Since you put most of your thoughts in italics, this should be in italics too. And what I see nearly rips my heart out, ...

Another boy reached out to take my hand, but I pulled away from him. “C’mon, baby , don't be like that .” It just sounds better that way xD “Good ...

“ Um , yeah. Congratulations. Just keep your back to yourself.” Yes, I know, it's just a spelling error xD. Later, when he let go of my hand and put ...

Bare with me here, this is my first post xD. One peanut after another. They were too salty. I think you should combine those two sentences... they're both pretty small ...