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Re: An Alien Named Bob- Chapter 1 (Manoj), Chapter 2 (Bob) and Chapter 3 (Codfold)
Hi, So a couple things I noticed: The paragraphs could be less split up. There are a lot of one sentence paragraphs which are following a continuous line of thought ...
May 24, 2020 -
Re: Fallen Soul- Chapter Three
How has this been in the Green room so long? Oh, hey, hi. How? This is generally really good. First off a summary: Indigo is starting back at high school ...
Jul 28, 2019 -
Re: Delta - 25.2
Hello LordWolf First a summary: after a quick doze Harry and Will get dressed. Harry reveals how her power works and her weakness, ink. This was one of those scenes ...
Jul 28, 2019 -
Re: Suburban Summer Night-*not yet finished* :)
Hello, So I like to start my reviews off with a summary: The main character is sitting outside during a sunset. They see a boy, Jacob who they want to ...
Jul 28, 2019 -
Re: Delta - 24.4
Hello, Lana, back again, horribly out of order. So my first thoughts on opening this up were this is the third part of this sex scene. Because I've already talked ...
Jul 28, 2019 -
Re: A Pocketful of Posies - Chapter 32.1
Hello, Panikos. So I like to start off reviews with a summary: Following a more or less successful heist? petty theft? targeted attack? Hildegarde returns to the home of Vie, ...
Jul 28, 2019 -
Re: Delta - 24.2
Hey, its Lana. I know I've reviewed other pieces in this section of your story before. I think I read the one right after this one. So let's finally get ...
Jul 27, 2019 -
Re: Delta - 25.1
Hi. I think I reviewed another piece of yours a while ago. First a summary: this wasn't really an action beat so in the grand scheme there's only so must ...
Jul 25, 2019 -
Re: Delta - 24.3
HI! It's Lana, your friendly neighborhood asexual here to review your erotic scene! Don't worry I have zero practical experience! Ahem. But in all seriousness, I've read a lot of ...
Jul 13, 2019 -
Re: Soul Cutters Chapter 13
Hi. I'm Lana. So I like to start out with a summary to make sure I have the details straight: Mel and POV character (who I'm sure has a name ...
Jul 9, 2019 -
Re: (Vampire's Fall) ch 3
Hiya. So I like to start off my reviews with a summary to make sure I understood what was going on: Gia is experiencing about the same thing two times. ...
Jun 26, 2019 -
Re: Lohikarmen: A tale of humans and dragons (Chapter 7: The slave dragoness)
Hello. I'm Lana here to review. So first off a summary to see if I got all the details: Narken is a dragon enslaved by this bounty hunter guy who ...
Jun 25, 2019 -
Re: No more tears (Draft 3.0)
Hey-o. Sorry if this review is a little late. I've been busy putting my life in order and all my free time has gone to a stupid bet I made ...
Dec 21, 2018 -
Re: No more tears
Hey-o. This is Lana, you requested a review from I'm gonna do that. Synopsis: So this old guy has the power to see how long until a person will cry ...
Dec 17, 2018 -
Re: Honey and Sunshine
Hey-o. This is Lana. You requested a review from me and I am delivering. First off this is a particularly difficult one for me to edit because it is EXACTLY ...
Dec 15, 2018