Kiwisatsuma

Hey! :) Hmmm, I like this. There's some really good decription and I think the vague, abstractey feel works well. So no light is visible. Light itself doesn’t exist, nothing ...

Hey! :) I've never reviewed a script before and I'm not entirely sure how to go about doing it, so... here goes! :smt003 John walks into office he's wearing a ...

Hey! :) Ooh! This is getting really interesting. This chapter was definitely just as good as the last two. Quiet," he shouted and reveled in the complete attention everyone gave ...

Hey there! :) So, this was a pretty good story opening. The first section was definitely my favourite part and it grabbed my attention straight away. It's just a formatting ...

Hey! :) I like this a lot. The metaphor worked really well and was really sweet, but also gave a balanced picture of the relationship. The only thing I would ...

Hey! :) First off, this seems more like a prologue than a preface. A preface is a preliminary statement that sets up the writers intention, that sort of thing, whereas ...

Hey! :) I like the story you tell here, and the emotion really builds as you get further on. However, I would say that the first three stanzas are weaker. ...

Hey! :) Great chapter! It's definitely my favourite one so far. I like how you've shown more of the pups' characters. It looks like Isha's already covered a lot of ...

Hey :) This was really good, especially for something written in only half an hour. I especially liked the way the narrator was talking to their mum. However, while it's ...

Hey there :) I do think this has potential but, as the other reviewers have said, the way it's all shoved together in one thick paragraph makes it difficut to ...

Hey :) I thought this was good. I especially liked the contrast between the images in the first two stanzas and in the third, and the way it hinted at ...

Hey :) I like where this is going so far. Plunging straight in with an action scene drew me in well. However, I do agree with TheEnigma that the action ...

Hey there :) Welcome to YWS! :D So, this story seems interesting. You've got an exciting first chapter which drew me in quickly. However, there are a few small grammatical ...

Hey :) Welcome to YWS! I like this a lot. As a novel beginning it's interesting and well written and definitely makes me want to read more. Running as hard ...

Hey :) It's true that this a story about love but I think it belongs more in the general stories section, because the romantic section is really just for stories ...