Kim

When roses aren't red, And violets aren't blue, What will become of me and you? ( I like how this flows, and is written backwards, from the normal poem) When ...

all i can say is wow, there are a few grammar errors, but i was so intrigued i couldnt stop reading. i personally like the discriptions you use, the way ...

i liked it, it is one of those poems you just write with emotion. you wrote it for you, so dont change anything. sometimes those are the best ones. the ...

your feelings sure come out in this. i can tell you wrote while feeling them. that is good. The light pitter-patter, Of the rain drumming on my head, Hide my ...

i really liked how this got your attention right from the start. the discriptions were vivid and allowed for a mental image. except for a few grammar errors. this was ...

i actually liked this, but then i am not into ryming poems. i like the ones that are written with feeling, honestly how can something be over done? it is ...

this is awesome bear, and as per your request i have read it twice, once for the story itself, and the second to find your errors. :D Her clothes slipped ...

This does keep getting better. i never know which twists you will add. suspenseful. I can see your writing change as you continue your story. you are adding so much ...

I thought this was very good. very well written. i could tell it was a nightmare. i liked the discriptions you used. as far as critiquing, it doesnt matter if ...

short and to the point. i really liked it. sometimes i like to use my imagination when reading, instead of always being told what to see. with few words, you ...

i was not reading and looking for errors, so if there are any hopefully kitty got them. i was reading for the meaning i found in this poem. the first ...

wow, this is deep. i enjoyed reading this alot. the only thing i would recommend is to add puncuation. commas, periods ect. also check your capitalization. Read it out loud ...

This very good, i like the discriptions you use. It is hard to read though, try and break it up into paragraphs. Large blocks tend to keep people from reading ...

I really liked it, cliche or not. i like how you showed love and hate, that is a big part of our lives. It will always be the subject in ...

this is great bear, i found just a few things you might want to change. I had done that to her. I had killed another human. ( the first sentence ...