Kelcia

Nicely written, I think, but I have some minor quibbles. "Can all this be inside of you to?" "And do you feel it to?" I think you mean "too." :) ...

I think that this is a very nice poem. The lines "You can't even see Your own selfish, cold heart" Seem a bit awkward to me. Maybe try rearranging the ...

Well, I think that with a little editing this could be quite a nice piece. I liked the use of repitition in some of your lines. It really gave a ...

I enjoyed it - it has a very nice tempo to it. The story in the poem was as author 'IveGotMyWords' says, bittersweet. I also agree that some of your ...

Hiya, You say this is your first time posting? Well, it's pretty good for a beginning. I think it has a lot of promise. The begining could use a little ...

I think this is a lovely piece. The dialouge is wonderful, and you have a very nice writing style. It's very believable, in that way. The length was not a ...

Hi, You mentioned this to me in the chatroom, so I took a peek. It's very good. I think your discription of the world - in daylight - really sets ...