KJ

I've heard it was good from several people actually... but I looked at it at Barnes & Noble and it just didn't seem like m my type of book. Maybe ...

Ash - I want to read this, but I'm going to reread Chapter One again before going on (I kind of forgot everything that has happened already). So I'll get ...

Ash, I'll reread it, but print it out, OK? I hate staring at the computer screen for long periods of time, and this will take some time. So yeah, print ...

Thanks everyone for your great critiques. I really appreciate the help and the fact that you enjoyed it. And Samuel - that's really neat about your family history. I'd be ...

You don't sound needy. What I would do, to make it more clear about the memorial, is not to make the boy stumble into the "rock". I would have had ...

This was pretty good. You have good description and I enjoyed the beginning of the plot. You kept it moving, which is also good. I caught nothing to point out, ...

Sorry to be so unhelpful - I liked it a ton. Very well-written, creative, and excellent in practically every way. So sorry.

I very much enjoyed it. You have a solid beginning, and it was very well-written. Sorry I'm so unhelpful. I found nothing worth pointing out, other than that it was ...

Hey, aren't you going to continue this?! You can't just leave us hanging. WRITE MORE. Sorry I have no critiques; I was too into the story. Waiting for more.

Extremely... short? I realize that you meant it to be this way, but should this be in Other Fiction then? It's witty, I'll give you that. I guess I don't ...

Hey. This was as great as the first. You just need to watch your commas; you're missing some. Well-written, and brave of you to share with people. It really is ...

Can't read this, sorry. You need spacing and perhaps shortening it would be better.

Very well done. Creative and thought-provoking. I hope you do well in the contest.

Me again. You've much improved this piece with your editing. I found a few more things that need to be adjusted : Now it was him, Mom giggled with. Don't ...

Hey Kool. I want to read this badly, but I am literally out of time. The bell has already rung and I got to get to my next class. But ...