Jon

I always wanted what you had; I think it would sound better as, 'I've' stealing down shadow-ways to snatch at - discarded bottle caps. I don't understand the bottle cap ...

In a flurry of pages Maybe you change flurry to something else, Blizzard sounds stronger and better here. And spaces blank; If the pages are flying around, it sounds odd ...

Sureal, this was very good! It flowed along nicely and i found very few things that could have been improved: The sunlight, filtered through the bright canopy of leaves above, ...

Look, no, look deeper. It would sound better like this, "Look, okay, now look deeper." Into the deepest holes of hell, there lies the home of demons. "In the deepest ...

Candles all raised high, against the growing dark. I like these two verses because They show a powerful scene and it makes me want to read more. However while good ...

I just gave this a really thorough review and I accidentally click over on the next button and lost it all, But anyway, check this site out : It should ...

Still with restful eyes, she rolled over onto her back .--- If she was still why would she roll on her back? Or tried to anyway, for she rolled right ...

stop being mean, you three! You are only 13, which isn't saying that all 13 year olds can't write, you need some more experience. I would suggest reading some poetry, ...

I thought this was a nice piece, sarah. Just because one person doesn't like it *cough icaruss cough* that does't mean it's not good. There will always be someone who ...

Slamming Doors and broken hearts [b]--- comma Pounded pillows torn apart[/b] ----these are my favorite two lines of the whole poem! put a period! Hate and words, no understanding --- ...

Um... ... I thought you weren't supposed to use full caps in titles. Anyway i thought it was... um... :D ---Jon--- :D

Is this character named after me? haha Anyway i have no time to give it a proper crit, however i liked it! I May be back to give it a ...

I can speak/write spanish because I've been in spanish class for three years now so i could read this. I can't spot anyof the grammar mistakes because it is in ...

Hey BBB, This poem was just O.K. for me, I don't see how me critiquing this is going to help because you have a lot of critiques already. However my ...

This was Brilliant Kris! I have nothing to add because Of the other post, sorry. I really felt throughout the entire poem what the person was feeling, I felt the ...