Jon

It’s a giant abyss The world beneath me (I think you should add in a : after 'me') A universe of souls Always revolving (Nice imagery! :D ) Down here ...

I celebrate natured roads with a tinge d of with Human s . :D I made those changes...the way you had it was oddly worded. Also, it just sounded off. ...

the washedout streets \ "washed - out"? beside s an isolated Nix the "s". way-out - vision I think if you add one more "-" it'd make the rythm more ...

I didn’t meet any of the curious stares,( ; instead of comma? ) just sat down and got out a piece of paper. I Let them think what they liked. ...

"Back to square one," the skinny, blond girl commented When you say "Commented", it feels as though she's scoring something. Or, that someone else is in the room that has ...

Hi, my name is Jon! I just want to say that the opening stanza of this poem is absolutely wonderful! I loved it! (Now onto the review, :P) I also ...

Hi, my name is Jon! care so much yet u still hide In poetry, you do not have to capitalize your words, however, you must use correct grammar. (Spelling.) Change ...

Hey, Young! (Thanks for the review on "Red Cup Wishes"!) I'm Jon! Let me start off by saying that I would like to see more punctuation. Now, I realize that ...

HI, Quill! I'm Jon! This desk is the Parthenon. My fingers pick at splinters and varnish, in a lineup I am another one shuffled forward, past, to leave my mark ...

*Cracks Knuckles* Before I get into the review I want to say that this needs to be expanded. The ideas you have here go way too fast. This whole poem ...

Hey Kat! Jon here! as if never to fall, to die . Don't use the word, 'fall' here. A flame never falls; perhaps a country does and it dies off, ...

Hi Ash! Jon here! :D The bitterly cold, winter wind blew hard through the snow covered forest. You over-describe in this sentence. To get the same effect without being redundant ...

Hey Gal, Jon here! and sank the U-boat upon a prickled This was an interesting opening, with the 'and' to start it. Nice touch. However, a U-boat isn't a boat, ...

Hi Brendon! Jon here! :D His back sticks to the icy wall like a tongue on an ice block, devouring, drawing him into the winter. I have a problem with ...

Well, you said please. :wink: Jon here! It is red- red as the early moon, swathed in brilliant rubies, rising just at noon- It is my wound. Your rhyme scheme ...