Jetpack

Hey there, I'll give you a review. I notice you're new here, so welcome! YWS has a rule that says that you have to do two reviews for every one ...

Yeah, I think a trilogy is almost always enough. I hate series with several books, because the idea rots as more and more books try to squeeze as much as ...

I really, really liked this. I don't like to give short reviews like this, but there wasn't too much here that I could criticise. I have maybe one or two ...

I agree that this is different, and though the idea is a little confusing, at least it's original. However, I don't really like the style here. I think you need ...

Erm, yes, the title does need some love. That can be looked at later, though, or even when you've finished. I'll concern myself with the little you've posted. Be warned, ...

I'll give you a review. As a quick warning, I'm going through this line-by-line and it's the first time I've read it, so I might miss the big picture. I ...

This is quite a quirky story, and it was going well enough until I hit the end of the story. If I had to estimate that point, I'd say it ...

This is very short, even for a prologue. Is it finished? Are you intending to expand it at all? It seems somewhat rushed, and a bit sudden in its ending. ...

You asked for shredding. I tried. :P She moved with agility, grace and slender that no human could possibly achieve I don't think 'slender' is a noun. Having just googled ...

Hi, I go by Jetpack. I see you're new, so hi. *waves* On YWS, there's a ratio of 2:1 of reviews to pieces of work you post. You've already got ...

I could probably have read your original, but maybe it would be better if I read this and judge it for what it is rather than comparatively. Hopefully you'll get ...

The title caught me, so I thought I'd give this a look. I'll start with nitpicks and some comments on word choice, and then a few more general opinions at ...

Hi. Skimming this, it sounds a lot like the sort of thing I like to write - a scene as opposed to a play, if you see what I mean. ...

Hi. As this is short, I think I'll just run through it and comment as I go, so prepare for a lot of me repeating myself. As Cotton said, I ...

Hi, I'll give you a review. Second vampire story of the day for me. I think the title is a little cliché. You could probably think of something a little ...