JennyImStory

Oh my god! I just realized that I used the older version of this exerpt! Man I'm an idiot. Thanks so much for the critiques, and I think you'll find ...

I apologize in advance if it's difficult to tell the difference between Arven's and his Issiral's (Clessidi) thoughts. I couldn't think of a good way to make them different . ...

AMAZING!!! That's all. Thank you for sharing this with us. B-bye.

Just realized that main character's name is in the description. Well! I said the title was cool! So cool, that I didn't even bother with the description.

Thank you so much! Some of your examples were really good but sometimes it's just a battle between describing things well and not using information your POV character doesn't know. ...

Thank you!

Thank you friend!

Thank you very much!

This is part of a "series" so hints I leave here will be explained later on. But thank thank you so much!

Don't apologize, this is your work and you can do what you want with it. If they're just searching for the sake of curiosity great! Just show the reader that.

Just forget this is here. This was a typo.

I understand you concerns, but a lot of those things were intended for foreshadowing. I'm just wondering if there's anyway to indicate necessary information without info dumping because the last ...

It's PERFECT now!

Eviiiiiilllllllllllllllllll! (Those who don't get this, I'm not being mean)

Uhhh. Dude help me!! I can't think! I've forgotten how!