Gwenevire

Hey Andy. First off, I think you're a little confused here. Cause this is part two of a story I've already started. Thats probably whey you're getting the wrong idea ...

thanks anti-pop ill edit all my spelling mistakes. well... the swear words kinda are part of my character. but i guess i could cut some of them out... you've been ...

gnaat! nang that was awesome. anywho, imma crappy ass writer so i dont got shit to say but keep goin! i wanna see what else happens! larvyou

Ooh, my bad. Bubba is definitely a boy :P Ahah, don't worry. Its not over yet, I just didn't feel like writing anymore today... so I stopped there for now. ...

Thank you Whispering Rain :) Im glad you liked it. Yes, I am working on a plot.

Andy: you need to make it more clear to the reader as to who's Roxy and Bubba Yea that makes sense. I will try to make that a little more ...

Oh, I like the poem, but I don't see it...

Thanks :) I am actually starting it again. There is a prologue.

lol thanks :)

You say they are foster sisters, but you need to show it, through the way they act together... Can you see that they have a strong bond etc. I don't ...

Thank you all :) Camille I will make the edits right away :)

Thanks a tone! I will fix those right now :D What do you think of it now? I will PM you about friday :) love ya, Gweny xox

Yup =] Well, its bad enough our characters already have the same names, maybe you could make it Lyla... That would really help if you could. But we will still ...

Thanks :) I have done a little bit of polishing, it would be great if you could go over it again and give me a heads up on my progress/failure ...

Thank you Camille :) That really helps me, I understand a bit more about how I can show my character better from the inside. I will do the Mary-Sue test ...