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I will freely admit that this is better than I expected it to be. That does not mean it was good. First of all, the first line should be capitalized. ...

*blinks* *blinks again* ...That's it? Oy. All right. First of all, the first word of the second line should be "are" as you have two nouns preceding it. "Love and ...

HOOOOKAY. So the critique to end all critiques. Yes, I am going to tackle all three chapters--plus prologue--in one post. Suicidal? I prefer to think of it as devoted. Your ...

Oo I'm going to be critiquing a lot of creepy poetry for this next month, aren't I? :lol: I actually think this poem flows better than child, and while, as ...

As promised, a critique! I have to admit, when I first began reading this I did a sort of mental rolling of the eyes accompanied by a here-we-go-again . While ...

Actually, Snoink, it seemed to me like it was told in reverse order... from Allen's last death to his first. Is that right, smaur? In any event, I really liked ...

I'm not sure that normally I would enjoy this kind of poem, but given the circumstances behind it--and how well I can relate--I found it incredibly (almost freakishly) accurate. I'm ...

Well... it rhymes. If your aim was to have the last word of every line rhyme, you certainly have succeeded, and passably well--while quite often it lapsed into "bubblegum rhyme" ...

I'm confused as to what point you're trying to convey here. Oh, I know poetry doesn't have to have a point , per se, but it does need to have ...

I have to say, the second stanza is probably one of the most graceful, evocative descriptions of city life that I've read yet--and not just on this site. My only ...

Wow... I'll second cadmium, Clau! Creepy. In a good way, of course. This is very Lolita-esque, and generally it flows quite well (though I might replace "never" with "not" in ...

I'm not sure there was a single part of this poem that wasn't distressingly cliched--not even the main message. If you'd used an interesting, varied vocabulary then... no, it still ...

Jig... I love you. XD This is probably the most poetic expression of a marine mammal's sexual frustration that I've ever read. Then again, it's also the only expression of ...

For me, the attraction to White Oleander wasn't so much the plot as the author's writing style. At times it seems almost more like a prose poem than plain old ...

Dear Broken Wings, "Bumping your thread" in the Nonexistent But Nonetheless Widely Accepted Handbook of Unwritten YWS Rules is defined as: "1. a gauche action taken by inexperienced writers who ...