Fael57

Okay, officially trashing No. 2 ;) I've created a new stanza for No. 1. The rhythm is different, though: In my hope to keep your heart, I’ll be sincerely true. ...

I give you a 7.5. I also agree about the last stanza. Altogether, the poem was a bit boring as well.

It is a bit wordy, but the message gets through. It is a great comparison.

This looks great! It deserves at least 4 stars.

Was "lose" supposed to be "loose"? If so, here's how to spell it.

It's kind of short, but I get the point of what you are trying to say.

"The artist doesn't see things as they are, but as he is." I don't know who wrote this, but it's inexplicably true. Fael57

I think it's pretty good...could end up in a book someday. Who knows! Fael57