Evi

Here as requested, again! (From a long time ago, but whatever. ^_^ I keep up with my promises! xD) But, seriously, this is too long to post as one segment. ...

Hey Shina! ^_^ Congrats on your purplification. A stream of crimson surged down the coward's face, forming a pool of the substance below his chin. Here, you've avoided using the ...

Hey Vivi. ^_^ Here as requested. Honestly, I'm not sure if I really enjoyed this. I found it rather rushed, jumping from idea to idea without pausing long enough to ...

Hey Shina. ^^ Sorry for the wait, but it seems you already have some great advice. :arrow: The transition between the first and second paragraph is rather abrupt, I think. ...

Hey Jamie! ^_^ So sorry that it's taken me this long to review this story, but I'm finally here! Since it's so lengthy, though, I'm not going to read through ...

Hey Huggybear. ^_^ I'm running short on time, so I'm just going to make some quick points. Life keeps going on and on Sunrise, Sunset Like the way you kicked ...

Hey Gal. Bear with me here. flagships upon a dressing gown, fragments of linen upon a girl around a dressing gown. a line of combat boots and salute(s) to the ...

Hey Eddykins! ^_^ Sorry for this review taking so long. I'm very surprised you haven't received any critiques yet-- I thought this was actually very good. In fact, there's not ...

Hey Bickazer! Can I call you Azzy? I quite like that...*muses* I hope so too, thought Luanna, stepping into the archway. She paused before entering, casting the porter one last ...

Hey Bickazer. ^^ Since you do have so many fabulous suggestions here, I won't go quite as in-depth, just some general comments. I'll do a more thorough review on part ...

Hey Tuna! Since you already have a lot of opinions and I'm running short on time with a lot more reviews to finish, I'm just going to go over some ...

Hey Avery. ^^ Here as requested. You already have a lot of crits, so I'll just make some quick points. :arrow: Your main thing here, as everyone's been suggesting, is ...

Hey Cookies! ^^ Here as requested. :arrow: Grammar You are missing a heck of a lot of commas, love, and you have an abundance of fragments here. I'm going to ...

Hola. ^^ I read the first installment, but you already have an abundance of input on that one, so I thought I'd review both of them here. I really am ...

Hey Archer! ^^ So, first of all, I think this has a lot of potential. There aren't very many real problems , actually, but sometimes your style becomes stitled-- a ...