EloquentDragon

First off, very interesting, grabbed me right away. It was a VERY quick read though, okay for some exerpt paragraph thing but I really think you should give the action ...

(Whoops only posted half the review) One of your problems with having the story move too fast is that you're trying to dump info on the reader now, in this ...

How about: "Then Remembrance Fades" as a title?

...wow, for some reason the girls really went for this...

LOL, so now I'm a native Spanish speaker, what next....

Thanks for your reviews everyone. I didn't add any details about the MC because I wanted the reader to visualize him/her for themselves. Whoever you see in your mind, that ...

As an answer to all of your questions. No, they don't euthanize autistic people. (At least not here in the U.S.). However, there are (many) politicians who do think that ...

BTW how's it coming?

Heh heh. *like*

Thanks K, I'll show this to my brother. 10-4

Thanks Walkin,' I changed those things right away. If no one else objects, I think I'll submit this to the Three-Pronged contest. Here I go!

Chapter 2 Opal "But, Opal...," said Violet, "Isn't that illegal?! She can't do that ...can she?" Violet is my best friend. She has blond hair , very pale skin, and ...

Alright! Time for a rewrite! Get back soon with the revised copy.

Thanks guys! Yes, this is an entry to the Trident Three-Pronged contest, so even though I wanted to expand on this, there is a 1,000 word limit. However, I can ...

Pre-Script: I read Chapter One after writing this review. xD So to answer your question... Well I think what Danipower is saying (And I would agree with this) Just take ...