DudeMcGuy

Hi Shadow, Here with another review! A few things first: rolling up the sleeves of Father’s old flannel shirt Good description, but "flannel" feels out of place in this world. ...

Hi Shadow, I'm back for more! Starting with Auron was a nice touch to start this chapter. And even though this section was short, it was able to add to ...

A lifelong 'Gamer' here (I don't really care for that tag, but that's OK) to give you two thumbs up for this. If you wanted to, you could also mention/compare ...

Hi Shadow, I'm dropping in for a quick review here. I mostly agree with what all the other reviewers have said so far. They all gave you some great advice. ...

Hi Twit, Jumping in right away, because I'm pressed for time: I found this to be quite good and entertaining. As others have mentioned the strongest part of the chapter ...

Hi Shadow, So I think I liked this chapter even better than the last one. It's tough to say because they are both great. So good job! :) Here are ...

Hi Shadow, This is going to be more of an overview than one of my usual nitpicky review. (Alas, I am short on time these days). It's a shame too, ...

Hi Shadow, So I'm finally getting to this... Better late than never. This is a review as I read at the same time, so it won't be as detailed as ...

Hello Ben, I saw your message, and here I am! :) So like I said in the last review, avoid the word "had" (unless to clarify specific moments in the ...

Hello Ben, I'm sorry this is so late. I tried to get around to it sooner, but I've been busy. First of all let me just say this was a ...

Hi Stori! This was pretty good overall I thought. You could add in a few more descriptions with the environment and characters as Fellow suggested. I think that would be ...

Hi Clarity, Here is the review you requested, albiet a little late. Hope you don't mind. I'll be reviewing th second draft part. I did enjoy the introduction part with ...

I'm back again Shadow! Let's get to it. So right off the bat there are quite a few "had's" in this chapter too. I'm sure you can see them yourself ...

Hey Shadow, Sorry it took so long to get to this. It seems you already have some excellent feedback on this chapter, so this review won't be quite as long ...

I'm back for more Shadow! Here we go! The day was as clear as the last had been ... Oh no! "Had been" again right off the bat! Just kidding. ...