DrunkOnWriting

Better! You just need to tweak the punctuation a bit...some of those commas I believe should be periods. For example: Without these dreams, Hopes and fears, You can’t be, Your ...

just to help you out with this a little: I was trying to make this feel a bit hectic; when something shocking happens, good or bad, it usually takes a ...

Great imagery, I'm not a huge fan of this style but this poem was actually quite enjoyable. As it went on I could feel the growing emotional intensity. Lovely.

Literally couldn't find one thing wrong with this. A beautiful, well written piece of work. It's very refreshing to read something like this...you've definitely made a lasting impression on me!

A beautiful poem, it really gives the reader a feeling of fantasy. Nice ryhme scheme, I really liked the gentle flow of your words:) Keep it up!

Wow. This poem is powerful, gripping, and emotional...very personal but isn't the best poetry made that way? Keep it up, this one gave me chills :)

Beautiful! You really seem to have a talent for writing. The flow is excellent, and I love poems that can activate your senses this way!