Chibi

What she said. I read about...a quarter of it and my eyes were going fuzzy and my brain was saying NO WAY. Space it, give us clean paragraphs to read ...

but I am still playing around with the idea of what other clues I should insert to give the reader more of a feeling that she is infact a woman. ...

Not bad, I like it. You posted the first chapter a while ago aye? I remember it from somewhere so I just skimmed it and read the second one. I ...

I actually thought the spider was eaten by a bird...and then I started wondering where the blazes the bird came from. Verses structure could use a bit of work, three ...

Honey, try reading some actual poetry before you post something. It's not even free verse...you just kept on writing something for as long as you wanted to, without any thought ...

Okay...Now I feel a little bit dense. Either that or I'm more tired than I think I am. Because I honestly cannot get into that poem. I'm like, reading it ...

Not bad, albeit I see three verses in that. Just three different sections of your poem that's all. Never say goodbye to me, I promise to see you soon, Why ...

A rather...depressive poem I think. Seriously, try to work on your self-image, I'm sure it's not -that- bad sheesh! Now, one line just...juttered out of place in the middle of ...

Interesting poem...I feel it is more suited to Hallowe'en than Christmas XD But you get that. Bubbles suggested punctuation yes? Well...I agree with her, to a certain extent. Some places ...

Very nice, it's got a tone of...well, disbelief, despair and oh what's the word I'm looking for? Self-pity, that's it. You may ask where I got these ...emotions from? Well ...

It was...intruiging. I rather liked some parts...like this one Am I the only crazy one, live in a world of pain? Or am the one who's right, and everyone else ...

Grar! Wonderful tale by the way but argh! The typos, the continual dimness, the constant tension! Grrr. Alright, going from the top shall we? This will take a while I ...

Very nice! It's almost exactly what I consider Frankensteins creation to be thinking, when he was building the lady. ...except for the creepyness I think. I mean, from what I ...

I’ve never felt as warm As I do now Cliche yes, but add -- onto the end of it. so it would read I've never felt as warm -- As ...

Yeeeeeeaaaah....the format. I was like, read read zip ping new line. Read read zip ping new line. read read zip ping new line.....you get the idea. All the line breaks ...