Have you ever wondered what is in insanity's thought?
Now you'll know, I'll tell you, because I've been there and back
I've seen myself when my mind and my heart have fought
And I know what it's like when you know that your mind will crack
Sometimes I wonder if what I am doing is strange
If the slot in the back of my head is filling with change
Sometimes I'm stuck with my foot between here and there
But that's all right because when I'm not here I don't care
Insanity; it comes and goes; always almost and almost never always
You don't get it, do you? They never do - that's okay
I'll trade all of my own yesterdays for all of your todays
You better listen, 'cause nobody else will say.
You have to know how to look, and know how to find
And when you get there, you'll see your own mind
You won't like what you see; few people do
But that should be fine 'cause at least it's you
For a picture of my mind, look inside your own
A man who knows himself knows all
When two parts of you fight, you don't know or care
As for me...now it's insanitys' call
Am I the only crazy one, live in a world of pain?
Or am the one who's right, and everyone else is insane?
Have I found the way to discover your mind?
Or am I the one who's so far behind?
Who could ever tell what's wrong and right?
Aren't you the one who decides?
But your conscience doesn't give up without a fight
And human nature always divides
One would think a smile would do the trick
Those voices go away and you're not so sick
Those voices never change, they will never;
Until they've left their mark, changed you forever
Like they changed me
Insanity
Insanity
Insanity
One word, one translation, one meaning...
So much trouble for others,
So much oblivion for us.
Oblivion. Insanity.
A little break in the flow of thoughts
A little break from insanity.
I tell others what it is, and ask, what is it?
- then I go back.
I fade once more - my oblivion returns
What's happened? What?
Ah, now I read and remember...this is who I am.
INSANITY.
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So, the same lines that people didnt seem to get, are the ones I loved.
example:
LOVE it. And your right; "I'm barely ever sane" would not have sounded at all right.
I have a sister who has been to insanity and back, (hospitalized and everything) so I related to this. Its all so real and you said it so perfectly. Really nice work, if I do say so myself.
And by the way - Its okay to not have a title. It makes it more mysterious.
It was...intruiging. I rather liked some parts...like this one
Although, rather than making it four sentences, I would suggest only two? For example
Am I the only crazy one, live in a world of pain;
Or am I the one who's right, and everyone else is insane?
Have I found the way to discover your mind,
Or am I the one who's so far behind?
Just a thought of course, but I like that quote regardless ^_^
~Chibi
This is pretty much a roundabout way of saying 'not very often'. I was referring to sanity here. Always almost, I'm always almost sane, but almost never always sane. I could have said "I'm hardly ever sane," but that wouldn't have sounded right.
Good work, but personally I don't think the change in structure is working for you here. Try reworking the last bit into couplets like the rest, see where it takes you.
=) This poem is an extremely defined well written and way longer version ofmy "battling plane", I love it. You should read my short "battling plane", you might like it, having you wrote this.
=)
This almost felt like two separate poems to me because of the sharp change in structure (from couplets to freeform at the end) and also because they seemed to be tackling the subject in two separate ways. The first part was a bunch of random musings on the subject, while the other one basically was insane with no regard to conventional form. Personally, I liked the second form better. The interesting thoughts you had in the first section were lost in the extra words. The second part forces you to think a little more and is overall more interesting.

Well, that's my two cents, whatever it may be worth. Keep writing!
Considering, I guess, that this is "Lyric poetry", are you really insane?
but aren't we all?
Besides that, I thought it sounded cool. most of it I didn't really understand. I felt that you were going to tell me what insanity was, but you never really did. (perhaps I'm insane) There were weird lines, in a good way, that caught my my attention. With more time, perhaps I could decipher it. Do you know what you mean when you write those lines?
For example
Just some lines that I didn't get. But I like things that are beyond my own thought. Yet still, do you know what they mean?
Now you can eat your food for thought, au revoir!
The Genius
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